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Monday, August 27, 2012

In the Meantime

As a precursor to my book coming out I decided to start writing about singles. I hope to find questions or topics from singles out their via this blog, comments, FB, etc. Leave me a comment if you have any questions or ideas for me to write about. My first post in this series comes from Derek, an AZ LDS midsingle. He suggested I write about patiently waiting. He shared a beautiful quote from President Uchtdorf given in a Conference talk in 2010 called, "Continue in Patience":

"Patience is not passive, resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well."

I talk a lot in my life and write in my book about ways to deal with the "in the meantime" so I thought I would share a few of the practical things I've learned (and tried to apply) along the way.

Do What You Love

People are attracted to other people who are full of passion. It doesn't really matter what you love just love it. When you love something you have something to talk about, to do, and to share.  Doing something you love gives you an opportunity to really be yourself and people love and fall in love with people who are genuine and refreshing!

Find Your People

I'll never forget how it felt to be in my last year of my undergrad in my creative writing classes. It felt just like it did when I entered my grad school classes. I remember thinking...these are my people! 

Find your people—those who are passionate about the same things as you. Find people who think on your intellectual level, eat foods like you (find your fellow foodies), collect similar things like, or just enjoy the same sports teams as you.  Being around your people brings out out the quirky sides of you but also the best in you. 

Start Something 

I met my last boyfriend in a choir I started. I started the choir b/c my friend & I wanted to start singing on Sundays again and we didn't have time to be in the only other LDS choir we knew about. So we started one and now 10 months later I am loving every minute of joy it is to have started something that matters.

I am a huge fan of people who live out their dreams and make things happen in their lives. I already wrote a blog about this topic a few posts ago—if you are interested you can check it out here. When you start something you love you are bound to find your people.(see above)

Find the Best (FTB)

Nobody likes to be around people who are always negative. The saying "misery loves company" only lasts so long. Also, the more negative you are the more wear it actually takes on your looks, countenance, and your overall being. Negativity weighs you down. 

Your single friends don't know how to help you and your married friends are tired of hearing about your woes (they have woes of their own). So finding the best in situations can only help you. Look for the best in people, in situations, in your job, and in your situation. You will be amazed and much better you feel when you try to find the best in life.

Listen More Talk Less (LMTL)

 A co-worker of mine used to always tells our girls on the dorms at the residential treatment center, “you have two ears and one mouth for a reason.” I loved hearing him teach the girls the power of listening. A great quote on listening comes from Elder Ben Banks,

“[You] should spend a great deal of time listening, not just telling. This listening should be done with an open mind and heart. When [people] feel they can talk freely about their feelings, problems, and successes, wonderful relationships develop...” (Take Time for Your Children, Ensign, Nov. 1993, 28.)

There are far too many people wanting to talk in the world and not enough people who are willing to listen. It is amazing the things you learn, not just about others, but about yourself when you take the time to listen. There will be many times in your life that you will regret saying something but rarely ever will you regret taking the time to listen.

And so I hope a few of these ideas are applicable and helpful while you are patiently waiting or waiting patiently to make things happen in your life!

1 comment:

  1. These are wonderful! I found myself applying them to different kinds of waiting time. For me, it is my working hard on my writing, yet waiting until it becomes successful... these things apply to me, too.